I NEED A NEW JOB, I REALLY NEED A NEW JOB!!
I seriously need a new job, i do not want to be working for this MNC anymore. It's not that i hate/dislike my job, but i don't have passion for my job anymore. It sure doesn't help that many things have changed since the recent intergration.
I do not want to stay in the same industry any more. I studied mass communications, please let me know if anyone of you has an opening suitable for me. Thank you very much.
Showing posts with label Emo Shite. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Emo Shite. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Sunday, October 16, 2005
All Ok now
I have been absent from my blog for a long time now.
There are so many things to blog about for the past week. I'm not feeling too happy for the past week & I need some time to reflect on the relationship. I'm glad that things worked out after we had a heart-to-heart talk with each other. Hopefully, things stay alright this way for a long time.
We are now trying to furnish the flat simply & hoping to rent it out real soon. The unit's at Bedok, pretty near to the interchange & amenities are close by. Wet market, supermarkets, provision shops, food centre, you name it. It's a good location, generally.
Anyone interested, just send me a email.
There are so many things to blog about for the past week. I'm not feeling too happy for the past week & I need some time to reflect on the relationship. I'm glad that things worked out after we had a heart-to-heart talk with each other. Hopefully, things stay alright this way for a long time.
We are now trying to furnish the flat simply & hoping to rent it out real soon. The unit's at Bedok, pretty near to the interchange & amenities are close by. Wet market, supermarkets, provision shops, food centre, you name it. It's a good location, generally.
Anyone interested, just send me a email.
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
What Else Should I Do?
I'm totally clueless now. I have not a single idea what I should do to make things work.
We quarelled again, 3 hours ago.
I didn't wanna blow up, but i just hated him for using the 4-letter word on me. Surely, i deserved more respect than that. I totally ignored him on our way home, i told him how i felt. He didn't give me a response or an acknowledgement. I don't what else i can do.
I probably gave up my comms' job for him & my father-in-law.
I probably have to wait for 3 years to hold the customary rites.
I can't live in the new flat we bought, it has to be rented out.
I can't make use of the furniture (bedroom suite) we bought earlier this year.
I respected his decision to quit his job, to carry on with driving his dad's cab.
I keep my problems to myself, fearing that i would add on to his burden/stress.
I have to bear with some of his unreasonable relatives, without complaints.
I really don't know what else I could possibly do, to return to our happier days before. It might not be possible, I kept feeling that he thinks I'm not doing enough. I really don't know. I'm terribly upset, entirely lost.
We quarelled again, 3 hours ago.
I didn't wanna blow up, but i just hated him for using the 4-letter word on me. Surely, i deserved more respect than that. I totally ignored him on our way home, i told him how i felt. He didn't give me a response or an acknowledgement. I don't what else i can do.
I probably gave up my comms' job for him & my father-in-law.
I probably have to wait for 3 years to hold the customary rites.
I can't live in the new flat we bought, it has to be rented out.
I can't make use of the furniture (bedroom suite) we bought earlier this year.
I respected his decision to quit his job, to carry on with driving his dad's cab.
I keep my problems to myself, fearing that i would add on to his burden/stress.
I have to bear with some of his unreasonable relatives, without complaints.
I really don't know what else I could possibly do, to return to our happier days before. It might not be possible, I kept feeling that he thinks I'm not doing enough. I really don't know. I'm terribly upset, entirely lost.
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Gone
My father-in-law was cremated this afternoon at Mandai Crementorium.
He's physically gone forever, but he would always live in the hearts of his loved ones. Thanks to all whom left comments on the previous post.
He's physically gone forever, but he would always live in the hearts of his loved ones. Thanks to all whom left comments on the previous post.
Sunday, September 04, 2005
The Passing
This post has nothing to do with football or Liverpool.
My father-in-law lost his battle against cancer & passed away on Saturday's afternoon. I was by his side when he breathed his last. His battle with cancer lasted only 8 months. He was a very brave man, he went through a major surgical operation, countless sessions of radiotherapy & chemo; but couldn't fight the cancer cells no more, with his poor/non-existent immune system.
Standing by his hospital bed, seeing him breathing his last was traumatizing. I felt a great sense of loss, but also a sense of relief for him. Maybe this might be the best arrangement for him; he needn't suffer anymore from the painful process of chemo & the needles pricking his flesh. He was reduced to skin & bones for the last 2 weeks of his life, he couldn't eat anything & his eyes were almost bulging from its sockets & his cheeks were so sunken that it was so painful to see. I cried every time when I see him in this condition. There was nothing I could do neither to lessen the pain nor agony of his illness.
But I told myself that I must be strong for the living. My mother-in-law needs to be well taken care of, she lost her husband & the children are the only support she has in her life now. There are still tons of things to be done after the funeral, I must be strong for my husband & my mother-in-law.
Life is so unpredictable, treasure what you have now; don't let them turn into regrets when you lose them.
My father-in-law lost his battle against cancer & passed away on Saturday's afternoon. I was by his side when he breathed his last. His battle with cancer lasted only 8 months. He was a very brave man, he went through a major surgical operation, countless sessions of radiotherapy & chemo; but couldn't fight the cancer cells no more, with his poor/non-existent immune system.
Standing by his hospital bed, seeing him breathing his last was traumatizing. I felt a great sense of loss, but also a sense of relief for him. Maybe this might be the best arrangement for him; he needn't suffer anymore from the painful process of chemo & the needles pricking his flesh. He was reduced to skin & bones for the last 2 weeks of his life, he couldn't eat anything & his eyes were almost bulging from its sockets & his cheeks were so sunken that it was so painful to see. I cried every time when I see him in this condition. There was nothing I could do neither to lessen the pain nor agony of his illness.
But I told myself that I must be strong for the living. My mother-in-law needs to be well taken care of, she lost her husband & the children are the only support she has in her life now. There are still tons of things to be done after the funeral, I must be strong for my husband & my mother-in-law.
Life is so unpredictable, treasure what you have now; don't let them turn into regrets when you lose them.
Sunday, July 31, 2005
Scary
I know i haven't been blogging lately. I'm sorry to the visitors of my blog (if there's any).
I haven't been well lately, emotionally. But it's definitely affecting me physically.
I have been having scary thoughts that's very worrying. I keep seeing myself jumping off a building. I had the worst nightmare ever this Friday morning. I dreamt that I was knocked down by a vehicle just outside my office building. I still remember the dream vividly till now. I remembered seeing my "soul" leaving my body & was eventually looking over the bloody "me". I was startled by the dream at almost 230am on Friday morning, wide awake after I composed myself & told myself that it's only a dream. After that, I wasn't able to get to sleep.
I spoke to my pychologist friend about the dream. He said that I want to die sub-conciously, that's why I kept seeing such images and having that terrible dream. He mentioned that we don't usually remember our dreams that clearly. We might have been able to recall some details, but definitely not all of it. It's quite unusual that I remembered everything. The possible diagnosis he came up with was, either I am very stressed about my life or I'm really tired of living & want to end my life.
I don't know what to think now.
I haven't been well lately, emotionally. But it's definitely affecting me physically.
I have been having scary thoughts that's very worrying. I keep seeing myself jumping off a building. I had the worst nightmare ever this Friday morning. I dreamt that I was knocked down by a vehicle just outside my office building. I still remember the dream vividly till now. I remembered seeing my "soul" leaving my body & was eventually looking over the bloody "me". I was startled by the dream at almost 230am on Friday morning, wide awake after I composed myself & told myself that it's only a dream. After that, I wasn't able to get to sleep.
I spoke to my pychologist friend about the dream. He said that I want to die sub-conciously, that's why I kept seeing such images and having that terrible dream. He mentioned that we don't usually remember our dreams that clearly. We might have been able to recall some details, but definitely not all of it. It's quite unusual that I remembered everything. The possible diagnosis he came up with was, either I am very stressed about my life or I'm really tired of living & want to end my life.
I don't know what to think now.
Saturday, July 09, 2005
Troubled
Seriously, I'm troubled.
Though I'm happy with how things are progressing between my dearie & myself, we are due to get the keys to our place soon. We are still clueless about the renovations & we have had disagreements over how the works should go. But this isn't the main problem we have, I'm sure we can work it out.
I'm worried about a very close relative of mine (let's call him B). I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, he has cancer. He underwent one major surgery after painful chemo sessions to reduce the cancerous growth. A few months ago, there were cases of recurrance behind his heart. The doc suggested radiotherapy as it was too close to the heart to operate on. Once again, B went through the agonising pain of radiotherapy for a period of almost 3 months.
Luckily for him, the growth was discovered earlier & was successfully eliminated after the sessions. Per the doc visit this week, it was my turn to accompany B. The doc mentioned that the x-ray results seem to indicate another recurrance, but the blood tests are normal. The doc will keep monitoring & possibly do another blood test next month to confirm.
I'm really baffled, why do all the bad things happen to good people? Why can't B enjoy his old age in peace? He's almost 70 & it's really tough going for him to undergo the extensive chemo & radiotherapy sessions.
I'm really really sad & I don't know how much more of such suffering can B withstand. He's really really weak, not eating or sleeping well doesn't help. His healthy frame has been reduced to an almost skeletal frame. It hurts so much to look at him & much worse to hear from the doc that he might have to go through the dreaded treatment once again.
What can I do? I only want him to be healthy now, really.
Though I'm happy with how things are progressing between my dearie & myself, we are due to get the keys to our place soon. We are still clueless about the renovations & we have had disagreements over how the works should go. But this isn't the main problem we have, I'm sure we can work it out.
I'm worried about a very close relative of mine (let's call him B). I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, he has cancer. He underwent one major surgery after painful chemo sessions to reduce the cancerous growth. A few months ago, there were cases of recurrance behind his heart. The doc suggested radiotherapy as it was too close to the heart to operate on. Once again, B went through the agonising pain of radiotherapy for a period of almost 3 months.
Luckily for him, the growth was discovered earlier & was successfully eliminated after the sessions. Per the doc visit this week, it was my turn to accompany B. The doc mentioned that the x-ray results seem to indicate another recurrance, but the blood tests are normal. The doc will keep monitoring & possibly do another blood test next month to confirm.
I'm really baffled, why do all the bad things happen to good people? Why can't B enjoy his old age in peace? He's almost 70 & it's really tough going for him to undergo the extensive chemo & radiotherapy sessions.
I'm really really sad & I don't know how much more of such suffering can B withstand. He's really really weak, not eating or sleeping well doesn't help. His healthy frame has been reduced to an almost skeletal frame. It hurts so much to look at him & much worse to hear from the doc that he might have to go through the dreaded treatment once again.
What can I do? I only want him to be healthy now, really.
Monday, June 20, 2005
I know how it feels now
Probably i realised things too late, maybe i wasn't thinking far enough.
Maybe i'm just not sensible enough, yet.
It's such a huge committment to spend the rest of your life with someone, starting a family, having kids, maintaining the relationship. It's never easy. You may say that that love is enough to keep the relationship, but it isn't in reality.
With the flat on the way, i need $$$ for the renovations. Though both of us have agreed to keep it simple, there wouldn't be too much of hacking & knocking, renovations would be kept to the minimum. But i do need furniture, don't I? I need a fridge, a bed, a TV, a DVD player, a wardrobe, a washing machine & many others.
I seriously and genuinely realised that saving is so important. Having a place of your own is cool, but there are so many things you have to consider before plunging into it. I never save on my own. Luckily for me, i always apportion a part of my salary to dearie & we are just going to have enough for the stuff.
I know how it feels like to be really really cash-strapped. It's not a good feeling. I shall never fuss about my elder brother whom never brings back $$ for the family. He's married with a son & my sis-in-law doesn't hold a full-time job; on top of that, he's paying off the loan on the flat alone. I shall never be critical of my brother again, because i know how it feels now.
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