Do You Ever Wonder?

Times passes by so quickly, do you ever wonder what will happen tomorrow?

Life's so unpredictable, everything gets thrown at you for no rhyme or reason. Sometimes, i do wonder about the happenings in the world & how it would affect me or the community.

Yet, life can be so simple and we can make it through without much effort. However, not that many of us are that fortunate. We go to school in the rigid study environment, autocratic parents, pressure to excel & sometimes; inferiority sets in.

I remembered my ambitions when i was young, i aspired to be a doctor when i was in primary school. The thought of wearing a crisp white robe & being able to save lifes all felt so great at that time. Then came secondary school, the aspiration changed directions. I wanted to be a journalist/reporter, though i was rather strong in my languages, the education system then didn't allow you to enrol into an educational institute based on your language merits alone; you needed Maths/Science & Humanities. I'm hopeless in those subjects, barely passed during the Biggie Os! There's goes the aspiration again...

In the end, i settled for an engineering course; which i still find unbelievable when i think about it now. Which idiot would opt to study to be an engineer when they are hopelessly aimless with Maths & Science? I'm that IDIOT! As expected, my grades weren't that great; i gave it all up with a year left; another moronic move!

Then came worklife at the Social University, with only an 'O' level education to boast about at that time; i settled for a retail job. The hours were long & the pay was pathetic. But i was happy, with my other colleagues, we would sometimes get together for supper after we closed the shop at night. Those were the carefree days, no exams or tests to cram for & no pressure to excel, just make sure & pray hard that I do not offend a customer.

A year or so went by, I started feeling inadequate. I saw an ex-classmate of mine from the polytechnic while i was working. I suddenly felt so ashamed of myself, i wanted to hide & wished i was invisible. But alas, she saw me & i avoided eye contact with her. She didn't say a word when she saw me, but i knew that she definitely recognised me. Was she too ashamed to be associated with me? I wonder...

Now, with a quarter of the century gone; I'm proud to say that i have been able to fulfill some of the aspirations i harboured during my younger days. I have managed to attain higher education on the area of my interest, Mass Communications. Armed with the higher qualifications, i've begun looking for a job that will consume & exploit my interest in the industry. But, the big break hasn't arrive yet; at least for me.

Who says life is so predictable & all planned out for you by the Man up there? It is what you make out of life that matters the most. I forgot where/whom i heard the below phrase from, but i find it real meaningful & tries to live by it.

"You Only Live Once, Make it Worthwhile"